Comparison between open adoption and closed adoption really hit me differently

I spent about 6 months really torn between open and closed adoption after I found out I was pregnant back in March. I talked to two different birth mothers from my support group in Portland. One had an open adoption with visits every 3 months and the other had a fully closed one for 8 years now. The open adoption mom said she gets pictures and letters plus two visits a year which sounded nice but also really hard emotionally. The closed adoption mom told me she had severe anxiety for the first 2 years but now she feels more settled and can move forward. I ended up going with semi-open where we exchange letters through the agency once a year. It's been 4 months and I'm wondering if I made the right choice or if I should switch. Has anyone else done semi-open and then changed their mind later?

2 comments

2 Comments

ivanb4121d ago

People don't talk enough about how the birth father's comfort level with openness should be part of this, since the agency letters can get awkward if he's not on the same page. Might be worth looping him in before you switch anything up.

beth_mitchell21d ago

Yeah totally forgot about that angle tbh.